Eileen Poiley studies her notes for her next episode of “Alzheimer’s Caregiver Podcast.” With an audience spanning 22 countries, the weekly podcast and monthly virtual support group she moderates aim to flatten the learning curve for family members caring for people with Alzheimer’s disease.

Poiley shares expertise developed over 37 years as director of education for the Byrd Institute.

“Until you are a caregiver for someone with Alzheimer’s or another dementia, you have no idea how difficult it is,” Poiley says. “Most people think ‘Oh, that’s the disease when they’re forgetful, a little confused.’ But it’s so much more than that. Once caregivers start on the learning curve and begin to understand the reality of how this disease affects their loved one, it’s just overwhelming.”

Alzheimer’s patients can easily become angry, agitated, depressed. Though they may recognize that something is wrong, they can’t understand it. They’re scared.

Caregivers experience frustration, uncertainty about where to turn for support and isolation. They are under tremendous stress.

Scott Huetteman understands the challenges. When his mother began showing signs of the disease four years ago — sharing false memories, forgetfulness — he started researching.

“There was a tremendous amount of information available, but it was so complex and all over the place,” he says. “There was no easy button, which is what a lot of us who are caregivers are looking for — someone or something that can just explain what’s going on.”

That “someone” turned out to be Poiley, who was among the speakers at an AARP-sponsored event in Tampa that Huetteman attended.

At the time, Huetteman, whose expertise is in marketing communications, was producing two podcasts. He thought that platform would be a great way to reach other caregivers who, like him, were searching for answers.

“Many caregivers are in a place that’s very scary, because they don’t know what’s going on,” Huetteman says. “They’re dealing with issues that would make just about anybody’s head spin. They’re not looking for long, drawn-out medical explanations. They’re looking for ‘What the heck do I do? What’s my first step?’”

He shared his idea with Poiley and, three years later, remains the producer of her podcast.

Poiley advises caregivers to focus on three priorities: maintaining their loved one’s safety, their health and their quality of life.“

Quality of life means giving them respect, maintaining their dignity and enjoying the moment,” she says. “Whatever enjoyment they can get from their reality is quality of life.”

“Their reality” is entirely different from that of the caregiver, who needs to learn to live in the reality of dementia.

“The person with Alzheimer’s not only loses their short-term memory, they also lose cognitive abilities,” Poiley says. The caregivers see that; the Alzheimer’s patients do not.

“I’ve talked to couples and I’ll ask the individual with Alzheimer’s why they don’t bring people in to help around the house and they’ll say, ‘Well, I cook and clean every day so I don’t need help,’’’ Poiley says.

“The caregiver will say the individual hasn’t cooked or cleaned in two years.” The caregiver’s learning journey has to start right away.

“By learning how to effectively communicate with your loved one, you not only are able to put out brush fires, you can prevent them,” Poiley says. “Agitation and anger often are part of the disease.

They can be caused by the environment, by over-stimulation and by how people are interacting with them. Caregivers can learn very good strategies early on to reduce and prevent some of the behaviors.”

Those strategies include being patient and adaptable, as well as developing the capacity to make decisions quickly — such as when a caregiver realizes their loved one is hiding kitchen knives under the sofa cushions.

“Caregivers always say that each day is different,” Poiley says. “It could be a completely good day or it could be an absolute, even overwhelming, disaster. And then they feel bad because they didn’t see it coming. You just can’t predict what’s going to happen. There’s not a specific road map because everyone goes through it differently.”

Find links to the Alzheimer’s Caregiver Podcast, the Caregiver Support Group and patient services at health.usf.edu/medicine/byrd.